What I've located, as I sit here inhaling a bag of Sun Chips (French Onion), is my (brace yourself) campaign speech from 1987. With these words, apparently I convinced you I'd be worthy of leadership and reunion-planning until the end of my days.
And I quote:
"My name is Jennifer Egge, you see
(that's Jennifer Egg with an E)
I'm here to convince you to vote for me
For your senior class treasurer/secretary.
You may not think I'm cracked up for the job,
But I think I can do it, don't think I'm a snob.
I'm egg-stremely egg-cited for our senior year,
But I must admit I'm egg-sperincing some fear.
I'm ready and willing to pick up the yoke [yolk, get it? heh . . heh . . never mind]
and do egg-actly what's needed for all of you folk.
My egg-stra small speech has now come to an end.
And voting is just around the bend.
So when you are choosing, please think again.
Remember me, and vote for Jenn."
Let it not be said I hid both my writing abilities (ahem) and my comedic chops under a bushel barrel as a youth. There you have both in flying colors. (Panther colors of course).
All kidding aside, I thought you might need a reprieve from all the talking heads.
And yes, I know I look like Sarah Palin.
And no, I have no idea how to put lipstick on a pitbull OR a pig.